Early's GPS is a living and sapient robotic GPS that was orignally a normal GPS made and assembled in China, it previously communicated by saying the words "Calculating" and "Calculate".
This GPS was from stolen from the Sheriff's police car by Early, prior to the events of the episode, that Early eventually comes across as a living being when Early was a about to fall off a cliff after leaving the roadway, the robotic GPS befriends Early throughout the episode as the GPS forms a bromance with him however decides to kill off two of his family members Russell & Ruby Jean so the two can be it forever.
History[]
In "Fatal Distraction" the GPS becomes sapient after Early almost falls off the roadway to a cliff, The GPS told him "Early, you blacked out we almost died", Early mentioned it almost made him spill his drink, the GPS say's "No, Early, No!", Early replies "damn robot", the GPS say's "I mean -- what why Do I have these feelings of self-preservation?, maybe, I'm more than just a machine?", Early say's "Whatever", the GPS mentions he was assembled in China, sitting in the Sheriff's police car which Early stole him out of, the GPS his eyes & face then formed.
The GPS say's "I'm Alive", I'm Alive!", "Everyone, I'm Alive!", Early say's "Yeah, You Alive, It's a miracle and all that, who knows?, maybe the good lord knew'd, he knew'd I needed A -- A", the GPS say's "A Friend?", Early say's "No -- a robotified, robochine, yeah".
The GPS say's "Robotified Robochine, I like that, I like that very much", Early say's "I'll call you "China", the GPS say's "China", Early says "But it will be "Chyna", with a "Y" 'Cause I think That's Sexy As Hell", the GPS say's "This is the happiest day of my life", the next scene is a montage of Early mudslinging, while riding on the truck, Early's son and mother Rusty & Granny see this action on-screen.
Later the GPS comes back, giving him a thumps up, the GPS say's "We went up yonder dirt road then we made a slight right and go", Both Early & the GPS say "30 yards up to the motorway", both laugh, Early mentioned "You wild, Chyna, Hell you wild!" "Whoo", "Iamwild", Granny mentioned he had some much fun with the truck.
Granny mentioned that robots always turn against you in the end, Soon Early & the GPS leave, for a Tailgate Party, Later he seen watching Early & Rusty through a window, soon the robotic GPS say's "What say we catch the game out here, guys?", he breaks the glass, he say's "You can imagine it with your mind's eye through the miracle of radio", Early say's "No, Hoss We Good".
The GPS say's "How about some bean dip?", he gives some bean dip, Early said "What the hell, hey shut that damn door!", the GPS say's "Should I make another beer run?, I could go straight on Gravel road 5.7 miles, then--", Early tells him to turn right & make a four way stop, Early say's "Hell, I don't want to hear the labor, I just want to see the damn baby, 12-Pack Of Babies, domestic, Ice-Cold -- Now!".
The GPS say's "Calculating", then runs off, Later the robotic GPS cooks Hot Dogs, he comes to Early, "Ahh smell of the brats tempt you"?, Early mentioned he gonna piss, the GPS say's "You want a ride to your final destination?", Early mentioned he going to the pissin' bush, the GPS say's "Yes", Early said "Hell No!", the GPS say's "But you could get lost without me", Early mentioned he didn't care about getting lost, the GPS say's "Icare, Early, Icare", Early mentioned that he pee-pee & just reabsorbed, back to his old jimmy jack, when he started to talkin' damn emotions to him, the GPS says "Early! don't go!", Early goes in.
Later in the morning, he is still there, soon the GPS rides outside, "Friends Forever", he takes Granny & Rusty to Disneyland, Rusty & Granny end up in the truck, the GPS told them "Early Is my buddy, you stay away from Early, otherwise, it's going to get real uncomfortable for you', the air blows, he say's "ReUncomfortable", soon as the air continues, Granny mentioned if that means they're ain't going to Disneyland, the GPS say's "Oh Disneyland", (laughs), "Almost Forgot calculating', they go to Disneyland, soon they end up at a cave, Later the GPS encounters Early going to a scooter, the robotic GPS goes to him & say's "Hey Early".
Early sees him, the GPS says "You're feeling better where you going?, I can drive", Early mentioned about he going to clear up his mind, the GPS mentioned about a nice drive to the country, includes flesh air, Early told on him to tweet, Early tries to drive to The Jiggle Hut, the GPS mentioned he was going 4.5 miles, to turn left at Dirt Road, to see a certain whore.
The GPS goes to the jiggle hut, but he ends up destroying the strip club, the GPS mentioned it was closed, Chyna mentioned he gave Early a box, the box contained a stripper, the GPS says "You thought you could get rid of me", Early mentioned he couldn't take no more, the GPS grabs Early & holds him, the GPS tells Early to get in the car, he said "If I Can't have you, Early, no one will".
Early say's "I thought we was gonna drive up to the coast -- reconnect!, that...Itinerary I suggested?", Early mentioned "I didn't like it, but now Ido, Let's Do it", the GPS say's "Yes, That was months ago", Early mentioned he was hasty as hell, to screw with himself, to forgive & forget, the GPS mentioned "It would be good to see the leaves turn", Early say "Hell Yeah!", the GPS say's "Maybe stay at one of those B&B's?", "Me & You".
Early & The GPS said, they go to a place where the Amish people live at, the GPS mentioned that the Amish people live at a Car Crusher, Horse-Drawn Car Crusher which Early called it, Early mentioned it makes butter too, Early wants to take a picture, however it is underneath a car crusher, Granny presses a button, The GPS is crushed to death by the Car Crusher, along with his truck, the broken robotic GPS gets destroyed & breaks down, the GPS is replaced by a another GPS but it was a GPS resembling Paul Stanley from the band Kiss.
Gallery[]
Appearances[]
- "Fatal Distraction" (Only Appearance)