Trucked Up 2: Glenn's Revenge/Quotes

Glenn: Okay. Huh. Great. I’m ready. Let’s do this. Toxic waste is a problem we all have. Gonna get rid of it, right? How? Glad you have ask, Mr. Halen. I have a twenty seven bron approach on how to do just that. One: dump it into the drinking water. It will be deluded, call it flavoring. Two: shoot it into space. It is infinite, play a room. Thirteen: Ignore it. Hope it grows legs and runs away. According to my mother, that’s what happened to my Space Ghost lunchbox, so it can happen here. Sixteen: Blame it on aliens. You’ve seen movies, right? Twenty seven: I didn- I didn’t have anything here, just try to pump out my list. It’s really a twenty six bron approach but are team feels like these are variable solutions. Well I did, and can I be frank about the other guy? We don’t play to each other’s strengths see cause one of my strengths is not drinking on the job. You get what I’m saying? Glug, glug, glug.
Dan Halen (voice): Early Cuyler, report to my office immediately and bring um, um… That other guy. The pear shaped one.
Glenn: Tried. You're a big boy.
Dan Halen: So how did uh, brainstorm meeting go? Did you and your “thinking partner” manage to figure out how to get rid of this toxic waste?
Glenn: Uh, yeah. Would do like a, uh, giveaway.
Dan Halen: A giveaway of toxic waste?
Glenn: Yeah. I mean, p-people love free stuff.
Dan Halen: Stop talking. Where is the other half of the brain trust?
Glenn: He said he was gonna work, uh, remotely or remote, or -- Something about a remote.
Dan Halen: Wh-wh-what are these?
Glenn: That’s my powerpoint presentation.
Dan Halen: Drinking water, fire into space. What is this, a rocket ship?
Glenn: That was an initial…
Dan Halen: Yeah, hang by thread, Glenn.
Early Cuyler: You got the Scrambler loud and proud baby. My ears is on.
Dan Halen: Early, it’s Dan. Where is your proposal for the toxic-waste removal?
Early Cuyler: I got a 10-100 in progress.
Glenn: Look, green sugar? Alright. Sorry.
Dan Halen: Hmm. Trucker slang for diarrhea.
Television Commercial Voiceover: …Straight hours of trucker movies.
Dan Halen: You’re watching the “trucker Tuesday” marathon, aren’t you?
Early Cuyler: That’s a negative. Uh, negatory. Uh, Tuesday’s my day to deal with clients. I can’t be there. Over.
Dan Halen: Oh, really? What are the names of these clients?
Early Cuyler: Well, there’s, uh, the snowman, uh, Sally field.
Dan Halen: Well, you’ve clearly got your hands full, Early. I guess this big-rig cross-country challenge will have to go to Glenn.
Glenn: Alright.
Early Cuyler: Wait a minute. What big-rig cross-country challenge?
Dan Halen: Oh only that you can’t take a load of flash-frozen freedom fries to Paris, France, in eighteen hours flat.
Glenn: That -- That can’t be done.
Dan Halen: That’s right, Glenn. They say it can’t be done.
Early Cuyler: Hell ain’t that one man I know that can pull that off… The Scrambler. Eighteen hours to Paris, France? Hell, there ain’t nothing can stop the Scrambler. Well, except for this large wet area here, which is showing up here on the map --
Glenn: No way that can be done. You think you could be? No, you can’t. Okay, you’ll have to click warp speed on a boat. Just turn them in. I would. I will to push people off. I’ll call the news.
Early Cuyler: Whoo! Yeah!
Glenn: Oh, come on man! You know what? Don’t have a good’un. Yeah, I like to answer the house driving question on a sticker of one of your truckers and his driving is bad. It’s bad.
Woman Voice: I’m sorry. I think you have the wrong number.
Glenn: This ain’t One-eight hundred-e… Oh great.
Sheriff: Uh, sir this lake is not zoned for parking.
Glenn: Did you not see that guy in a semi whole last through here?
Sheriff: That’s there, the Scrambler. They may need just the dickens.
Glenn: So, uh… Am I under arrest here?
Sheriff: Nah, I just kinda want to talk a little. Been a little bit lonely.
Glenn: And the twenty, my twenty born was gonna ship it in trucks. That was my idea.
Sheriff: Oh, is that a uh, rocket ship?
Glenn: Oh, where is my card? Uh, wet, uh, my presentation… Oh you get… I understand. You call me a tow… Water struck. Don’t reap on me here.
Glenn’s Wife: Oh, hey honey. Your uh, home here early?
Glenn: Don’t say that word to me.
Glenn’s Wife: What, early?
Glenn: I didn’t get to do the presentation today. Yeah, they rearranged the whole thing behind my back so the fix was the end.
Glenn’s Wife: I was looking up toxic waste removal today and in New Mexico…
Glenn: Is that Wikipedia? Five minutes on that and you can do my job. Part time huh? When you’re not here all day. Not doing laundry, not cooking dinner.
Glenn’s Wife: Shooting it into space?
Glenn: It’s a twenty seven bron approach. We weren’t gonna shoot it all into space. It's what the other brons are for. Stupid. You know what? Have a good one because I’m going to the basement to do the work then the money and make this household work. Try it you YouTuber. It’s like that smoke bomb up here. Yeah. Have a good one. Yeah, all camper. You can’t sit there. Have a good one. That’s right, ten year old. Uh, I’m 40 wow. Umm. Hey, baby, you look so pretty and peaceful there. Did you have a… Have a good one.
Glenn’s Wife: Umm, what?
Glenn: Come here.
Glenn’s Wife: No, no, no.
Glenn: Come here.
Glenn’s Wife: What are you doing? No, no.
Glenn: Oh yeah.
Glenn’s Wife: Glenn, come on.
Glenn: Come here.
Glenn’s Wife: Come on, Glenn. I have to wake up at early tomorrow.
Glenn: Huh. Oh yeah. Mmm. Mmm yeah. Huh. There you are. Get back into my mouth. Hello?
Early Cuyler: Ooo… Yeah baby.
Glenn: Hello?
Early Cuyler: Oh, uh, Glenn? Is your fine ass wife around?
Glenn: No, she’s asleep. She’s had a real long day so.
Early Cuyler: Okay then. Just tell her I said “Oh yeah, oh yeah, ha ha ha ha, you a fine piece of ass. What are you wearing?
Glenn: Just the rockports right now.
Early Cuyler: Not’s you Glenn. You wife. You tell her I to holler back to the Scrambler.
Glenn: How’s the cross ocean challenge going? You’ve made it to Bermuda yet? Dumbass.
Early Cuyler: I got the hammer down Glenn, come on. Oh, no! The damn bridge is out!
Glenn: Catch you on the flip. Catch you on the flip. Umm, I was… It was good to see you and now I’m leaving… Too chunky.
Unnamed DHSRI Employee: Then I heard he pitched a toxic waste giveaway.
Unnamed African-American DHSRI Employee: Who, that pear shaped guy?
Unnamed DHSRI Employee: Who does that?
Unnamed African-American DHSRI Employee: Yeah, I’ve met him like a dozen times. I still have no idea what his name is. It’s like Greg or Ben or Blenn or something like that. I don’t care.
Glenn: Yo, what up a-man. I’m Train.
Unnamed DHSRI Employee: Listen, I-I’m gonna get back and uh, do some really work.
Unnamed African-American DHSRI Employee: Well, back to the grinder.
Glenn: Have a good-- Catch you on the flip. You’ve having a good-- Nevermind. Uh, knock, knock? Mr. Halen, can I come in please?
Dan Halen: I rather you didn’t.
Glenn: I was thinking about this toxic waste thing.
Dan Halen: Waste? There no waste. It’s gone. What are you, an inspector? Who you with? Is there a whistleblower in my ranks? A mouth of the south?
Glenn: I’ve been doing some internet research and I was underground injection well…
Dan Halen: Too late! Problem solved, Glenn. Your wife can’t pull you out of this fire.
Glenn: Oh well. How’d you know? That was her idea.
Dan Halen: Are you insinuating that I’m bugged the homes of each and every one of my employees? That’s prophetess!
Glenn: Alright.
Dan Halen: Get out of here before I call security!
Rusty Cuyler: Hey, you Glenn? Daddy says you are a ma, a pear that talked.
Glenn: Yeah tha-that’s me. Is your daddy here?
Rusty Cuyler: Nah, he put on a hat and mustache and tore out of here a couple of weeks ago. Harder than something couldn’t be done, how he’s gonna do it and all. Yeah, he’s doing it.
Glenn: That’s cool, good for him. When he uh… When he gets home, you can just tell him, I definitely didn't stop by.
Rusty Cuyler: Alright then.
Glenn: Aw, come on.
Early Cuyler: Whoo!